Family Culture

What is culture? Are all cultures valid? How does this relate to the family?
These are all questions that I hope to answer with this blog post. I have thought about Culture most recently and how it impacts my life. Culture is the compilation of symbols, beliefs, languages, values, and artifacts. These specific aspects make up our culture and influence how we perceive the world.
Every single person sees the world individual and their own. While I served as a missionary for the Church of Jesus Christ, I had a companion that I worked with that we didn't get along. We fought and caused problems. It is because we had a different culture which affected how we perceived the world and each other. I would try to show love in how I knew but to her it translated to a hateful action. This doesn't mean we lived from very distant countries from each other. We actually lived just on opposite sides of the country.

Does that mean one of our cultures was not valid? No. In this instance it was belief of what certain actions mean. What makes a culture valid, it is valid when it contains truth and a positive effect on the population. All cultures has aspects that are not valid even here in the US.
How does this relate to family? This relates to family because within a family, there is an individual culture. I thought about this concept tremendously as I am soon to be married and blend two families. We both come from two different family cultures. His family never worried too much about money. They were in no wise rich but well taken care of. My family on the other hand were always scrambling. I remember worrying about money at a young age. These incidents have an impact on how we both spend our money. He sees that families go out to eat a lot and spend more time together. I on the other hand witnessed less family time and eating out. He participated in family dinner while I did not. We were both parented very differently. It sounds like we don't even belong together when described like this. We come from different backgrounds and cultures but we have some similarities and when we are married we get to create our own culture. We can take from each of our families those things we want to incorporate and ignore those that might not be valid.

Family culture can and will change as circumstance or needs arise. I gained an increased sympathy for the Mexican population that come to America illegally. The article The costs of getting ahead: Mexican family system changes after immigration by Martica L. Bacallao and Paul R. Smokowski talks about why they come and the challenges. I have always thought the Mexican people should stay and build their own country. What is it about America that they have to come? I learned how much they love their children and value their progression. They want to get them ahead by learning English, other skills, and having the opportunity for a good college education. They aren't leaving to become rich. They usually have many challenges getting here and living in America. So many would say is it really worth it? Those that cross the border illegally would say yes. Mexicans who can speak basic English can triple their income. They want their children to get ahead, and not themselves. Their family cultures shifts and becomes different from that in Mexico. Both parents will work and teenagers will work as well. While in Mexico only the father usually works. They have a traditional family structure and culture. The father usually goes ahead of the family. There is a distance from the father and his children for years. This distance doesn't change when they are all in America. The mother becomes the head of household with the absences of the father. Family culture and structure can change. This reminds me of people in abusive homes. There is hope because you can change it.

Nothing is definite. Family can be exactly the way you want it. It may require time and effort. Whether it is getting out of that abusive relationship, making family dinner a priority, better disciplining of children, or having better communication.